1-2-3 Magic, Discipline |
I thought I'd write an article about this discipline method because I get so many requests to explain it. It's an alternative to spanking and is a lot like the time-out method.
We started using this discipline method about 2 years ago. Our oldest son, who was 3 at the time, was getting impossible. I'm ashamed to admit I even spanked him a few times. Of course I felt guilty after and vowed never to do it again. We were in a constant power struggle with him until I found information about "1-2-3 Magic".
"1-2-3 Magic" involves counting your child for bad behavior. For example, your child talks back to you...you say "That's 1". They do it again, you say "That's 2", and again you say "That's 3, Take 5" (or 1 minute per age of the child). Hitting is an automatic time-out. The book suggested to give the time-out in the chills bedroom but this did not work for us. Our son would actually wreck his room!! So we modified it to better suit our family. We give these time-outs on a kitchen chair where we can keep an eye on them. The book also suggested that it is important to say nothing else when you are counting your child. I know I've done this before...you go on and on about something and your child just tunes you out. I do think its important to explain to your child after the time-out why he or she had one. This discipline method should be used for 'stop behavior' not 'start behavior'. For example, a 'start behavior' is if you want your child to start cleaning his/her room. A 'stop behavior' is sassing, hitting, whining, etc.
We find this method works great with our three boys ages 5, 3 1/2, and 2 (although we haven't used it on our 2 year old yet!). We have noticed a significant difference with our oldest son. He's even given himself a time-out just to cool down. I find this method gives BOTH the child and parent a chance to cool down. I know I've needed it to calm myself a few times! Spanking is done out of frustration and teaches our children that hitting is okay.
tracei | January 14, 2008 at 3:22 am - §
I love this metod because it works so very well with my young one not only that the daycare that I use uses the same metod