Ask Mr Dad: Doulas

By Armin Brott

Dear MrDad:

My wife says she wants to have a doula help out after the birth of our baby. First of all, what's a doula, and second, what's she going to do that I can't?

Answer:

First things first. Doula is a Greek word that means "woman caregiver of another woman." Doulas—usually women with children of their own—are thoroughly trained in how to give the laboring woman and her husband (that's you) emotional and physical support throughout labor, as well as other birth-related information.

Don't feel bad if you've never heard of a doula. It's a fairly new concept. Well, sort of. For hundreds of years pregnant women in more than 100 cultures have gone through labor with another woman at their side the whole time. That's the way it used to be here too. But starting in the 1930s, women began having babies in hospitals instead of at home, and everyone but the woman and her doctors was booted out of the delivery room. But in 1980, however, Dr. Marshall Klaus and his colleagues reintroduced the idea in the U.S. and gave it its name.

Besides being warm and fuzzy, having a doula around may have some other benefits as well: research has shown that it can reduce the length of a woman's labor by as much as 25 percent and the odds of her needing pain by nearly 50 percent. The chances of needing a forceps delivery drop 35-82 percent and of having a C-section drop 34-67 percent. Pretty impressive!

Like you, a lot of guys worry that having anyone else involved will end up diminishing their role. Fortunately, those fears are completely unfounded. Doulas are there to help both parents have the childbirth experience they want. Your wife has hormones (and pain) keeping her going, you don't. And if you try to be her sole source of support and clear thinking throughout the entire process, you'll snap. By encouraging you and giving you an occasional back rub or meal break, the doula is also letting you recharge your batteries, in effect helping you more effectively help your wife.

Most doulas charge a flat fee. This usually includes a prenatal visit or two, labor and delivery support (starting whenever you feel you need her through a few hours after the birth), and a few post-delivery visits to make sure everything's okay or, if needed, give your wife some breastfeeding advice and assistance. Check with your insurance company to see whether they'll pick up the tab, an increasing number will.

If you're interested in finding out more or in locating a doula, check with your wife's doctor or the hospital where you're planning to have the baby. Otherwise, contact Doulas of North America at www.dona.org.