Choosing a Guardian

Who will love my children?

By Catherine Rondina

It's a subject that most parents don¹t want to think about, but one every parent should take seriously ­naming a guardian for your children. As parents it's our responsibility to not only love and protect our children while we¹re alive, but also to have everything in place in the event of our death. Being prepared for the rare eventuality of both you and your spouse dying before your children are legally able to care for themselves is a scenario every parent must consider. By arranging all the legal matters ahead of time you can relax knowing that your children will get the care they deserve. Here's how to choose a guardian for your children.

Why you need to choose a guardian. It's simple -- if you don¹t name someone the courts will decide for you. All you have to do is name the person you want to be the "personal guardian" of your children in your will, should it be necessary. If you don¹t name a guardian, anyone who is interested can request the position. Then a judge must decide who will get your kids and you won¹t be there to offer your opinion.

Choosing the right person. Selecting a guardian for your children is one of the hardest parts of estate planning. You should choose an initial guardian and then have an alternate, in the event that your first choice can¹t serve. Those in the legal professional often suggest choosing one person. Many people choose co-guardians but this is not always a good idea. You may select a couple you know and when the time comes they may no longer be together. Here are some other factors to keep in mind:

• The prospective guardian must be over 18 years of age in most provinces. Choosing a much older guardian may not be wise either. Keep in mind that this guardian may have to be there for your child for years to come.
• Consider whether this person physically, emotionally and financially capable of handling the job of parenting?
• Does this person have the time to take on the responsibility of your family.
• Can your children stay together? This is what most parents want.
• Does the guardian share your moral and religious beliefs? Can he or she raise your children to share your values?
• Is your prospective guardian a parent already? Will this factor into how your children are cared for?
• Does this person want this responsibility? The person may not be willing or able to accept your offer.

Make Your Choices Known

Whatever decisions you make it's important that you make your wishes known. Let the person you¹ve chosen know that you¹ve selected her and ensure that she's comfortable with the responsibility. Even if you¹re 100 per cent sure of your choice, it¹s still advisable to discuss your thoughts and concerns about your children¹s further with the chosen guardian. Have a heart-to-heart chat or write a letter outlining your thoughts and feelings about how your children should be raised. Be brief and to the point, you don¹t want your nominee overwhelmed with instructions. The best way to guarantee that your children are raised as you would have wanted is to simply choose someone that knows you and you children well and you can trust to guide your loved ones through life¹s obstacles.