Crying and Your Baby |
Coping with Colic
All you can do if your baby has colic is learn to live with it, in the certain knowledge that she isn't ill or abnormal, and that the colic won't last. Don't suffer alone. This will be a difficult three months for you, your partner, and your baby. Try to remember these three points:
- Do whatever you can to try to soothe your baby. Keeping her in motion, feeding her frequently, rubbing her stomach rhythmically, or just cuddling her, may all soothe her for a short while.
- Don't resort to medications. You can't cure her colic, so you will be giving your baby large doses of medication for no real purpose.
- Try to have an occasional evening out. You can leave your partner or a competent, trusted relative to take charge.
Excerpt from
The Good Housekeeping Illustrated Book of Pregnancy & Baby Care
Your baby is bound to cry a great deal throughout his first year. To begin with, it's his only means of communicating his need for food and comfort, but from around three months you will notice a change. Instead of spending much of his waking time crying, he will use that time to learn about the world around him. The crying spells will lessen, and you will become more adept at understanding what he wants. When your baby cries, your instinct will be to pick him up and cuddle him. You don't have to worry that by doing so you are spoiling him, encouraging him to cry more. Your baby needs to know that he can rely on you. Nevertheless, constant bouts of crying are exhausting for you. If you find that your baby cries so much that you are losing patience, talk to your pediatrician: he may be able to put you in touch with other mothers or voluntary organizations that can help you find ways to cope.
WAYS TO SOOTHE YOUR NEWBORN
The important thing when your baby cries is to respond quickly without making a fuss. Letting him cry for a long time will agitate him more. See the next page for other possible causes. SEVEN WAYS TO SOOTHE YOUR CRYING BABY Feed her In the first months hunger is the most likely reason for your baby crying, and offering a breast or bottle is the most effective way to soothe her--even if that means frequent feedings day and night. Cuddle her Very often this will be just the sort of loving contact your baby needs to calm down and stop crying. If she quiets when you hold her upright against your shoulder, or face down in your arms, it may have been gas making her cry. If she has been passed around for relatives and friends to hold, she may just want a few quiet moments of being cuddled by a familiar parent.
Rock her rhythmically Movement often comforts a cranky baby, and may put her to sleep. Rock her in your arms, and if she doesn't quiet down, try rocking faster--perhaps 60 to 70 rocks per minute. Or just jiggle her up and down by shifting from foot to foot, perhaps with your baby in an infant carrier on your chest. Or rock with her in a rocking chair, if you have one. Or put her in her stroller or carriage and push her back and forth; if you can take her around the block, the gentle bumping over the pavement will soothe her.
Swaddle him Wrap him up quite firmly in a baby quilt or receiving blanket, tucking the ends under him to make a neat bundle. It may comfort him to feel safe and secure. Carry him around in your arms still swaddled up until he seems happier, and put him down to sleep on his back without unwrapping him. If your baby is crying because of something you've had to do to him--perhaps he hates being dressed or washed, for example--swaddling may be the best way to reassure and calm him, and stop the crying.
Pat her Rhythmically patting and rubbing her back or stomach will often calm her down and may help her to bring up gas. The feel of your hand will often comfort her when you first put her down to change her diaper, too.
Give him something to suck Almost all babies are soothed by sucking, and nowadays mothers are often sent home from the hospital with a pacifier for their newborn. Obstetrical nurses have been known to use them, so don't be afraid to try one. You might also offer your cranky baby your own clean little finger. Some newborns suck their own thumbs or fists.
Distract your baby Something to look at may make your baby forget why he was crying, at least for a while. Bright, colorful patterns may fascinate him. He will often gaze intently at postcards, wallpaper, or your clothes. Faces and mirrors are also excellent distractions, and a walk around the house to look at photographs or to peer into a mirror may calm him.
SEVEN REASONS YOUR BABY MIGHT BE CRYING
Often you won't really know why your young baby is crying or why she stopped. There may be times she is crying for no reason at all. If you've tried the simple remedies such as feeding and cuddling, and you've tried the soothing tactics that usually work, all without success, there may be another reason. Listed below are other possible causes.
Illness may be making your baby cry, particularly if her crying sounds different from normal. Always call your doctor if your baby shows any symptoms that are unusual for her. A blocked nose from a cold may prevent her from feeding or sucking her pacifier or thumb, so she can't comfort herself even though she may not be very ill. Your doctor can prescribe medication to help her breathe easily.
Diaper rash or a sore bottom may make your baby cry. Take her diaper off, clean her thoroughly, and, if possible, don't put a diaper back on for the rest of the day: just lay her on a towel. Take steps to treat the rash.
Colic, often called three-month or evening colic, is characterized by a pattern of regular, intense, inconsolable screaming at a particular time each day, usually the late afternoon or evening. The pattern appears at about three weeks, and can continue until 12 or 14 weeks. The crying spell may last as long as three hours. Always ask for medical advice the first time your baby screams inconsolably. Colic isn't harmful, but you might misdiagnose it and miss other, serious symptoms.
Your baby's surroundings may sometimes make her cry. She might be too cold: your baby's room temperature should not be less than 68-70°F (20-21°C). Or she might be too hot: if the back of your baby's neck feels warm and damp, pull down any quilt or blanket covering her and undo some clothes to cool her off. If she is sweating, a towel under the crib sheet may make her more comfortable. Bright lights can make her cry too: make sure an overhead lamp above her changing mat, or the sun, isn't shining in her eyes.
Activities she hates can't always be avoided, however loudly she voices her dislike. Dressing and undressing, bathing, having eye or nose drops are all common dislikes in a new baby, but all you can do is get them over with as quickly as possible, and then cuddle her to calm her down.
Your own mood may be a reason for your baby's distress. Perhaps it's evening and you're tired; or perhaps her cranking is making you irritable. Knowing that your baby is often just reacting to your mood may help you be calmer with her.
Too much fussing can make an upset baby cry all the more. Passing her between you, changing a diaper that doesn't need to be changed, offering to feed her again and again, discussing her crying in anxious voices, may all make her even more agitated, so she cries all the harder. If there's no obvious reason for her crying, don't keep trying to find one: she probably just wants to be held.
