Sex After Giving Birth

By Ann Douglas

While sex is probably the last thing on your mind during the first few hours and days postpartum, at some point it's going to show up on your radar screen again.

Here are some tips to make your first post-baby rendezvous as stress-free as possible for both yourself and your partner.

Take things slowly

There may be some tenderness the first time you make love, particularly if your episiotomy site hasn't had the chance to heal over completely. And even if your stitches have long since healed, it can take months for the soreness in the area to disappear.

Experiment with different positions

Since the traditional missionary position tends to put pressure right on the very area where you're most likely to be sore-your perineum-you might prefer to make love in other positions (e.g., side-lying or woman-on-top).

Keep in mind that Mother Nature may need a little help

Even if lubrication isn't normally a problem for you, it could be after the delivery. This is because breastfeeding hormones tend to dry up your vaginal secretions, reducing the amount of lubrication that's available when you want to make love. While an over-the-counter water-soluble lubricant will do the trick for most couples, don't be afraid to ask your doctor for a prescription for estrogen cream if vaginal dryness is a particular problem for you.

Don't expect sex to feel quite the same right away

If you gave birth vaginally, your vagina may feel a little looser than it did prior to the delivery. Of course, you'll regain much of your vaginal muscle tone over time if you make a point of doing your Kegel exercises on a regular basis.

Be prepared for a bit of a milk bath if you're a breastfeeding mom

Don't be surprised if you end up leaking milk during intercourse or if your breasts feel very uncomfortable if your partner puts any weight on them. The solution to both problems, by the way, is to feed your baby right before your romantic rendezvous-and, as an added bonus, your baby might even sleep through the whole thing!

Give some serious thought to birth control

There's a very good chance that you'll ovulate before you get your first period-something you might want to bear in mind if you're not exactly eager to see the pregnancy test come back positive again just yet.