The Gratitude Attitude: Teaching kids to feel grateful for what they have

By Ann Douglas

It isn’t easy to teach your kids to appreciate what they have when they are constantly being bombarded with advertising messages promoting whatever high-priced electronic gadgets or designer running shoes happen to be de rigueur this season. But if you take the time to encourage them to be grateful for what they have and to swim against the rising tide of consumerism, you’ll be giving them a far greater gift than anything you can buy in a store. Rather than sentencing them to a lifetime of trying to keep up with the Jones, you’ll be teaching them to be happy with less—something that can improve their quality of life tremendously, both today and well into the future.

Here are some tips on teaching kids to feel grateful for what they have.

- Be a good role model for your children. Rather than drooling over brochures for expensive cars or oohing and ahhing over the neighbours’ new home theatre system, make a point of regularly expressing gratitude for the sources of joy in your life. Don’t make the mistake of limiting your gratitude to material possessions alone, however, or you’ll be sending the not-too-subtle message to your kids that it’s what you have that counts. Instead, make a point of expressing your gratitude for the people in your life who mean the most to you.

 

 - Let your kids know how lucky they are to be living in a country like Canada. While you don’t want to serve up a 1960s-style lecture on all “the poor starving kids in India,” it doesn’t hurt to point out what life is like for people in other parts of the world. Your kids may be shocked to learn that some children go to bed hungry—a real eye-opener if their definition of poverty has, up until now, meant living in a household with only one TV.

- Remind your kids that more isn’t necessarily better and that advertising messages are carefully crafted to create an insatiable appetite for the latest (but not necessarily greatest) gizmos. In addition to teaching your kids how to distinguish between “the necessities” and “the frills”—a hard lesson for both grownups and kids alike—you might also consider participating as a family in International Buy Nothing Day. This annual event—which will take place on November 29 this year—encourages people to go on “a consumer fast” by buying nothing for 24 hours. You can find out more about Buy Nothing Day by visiting the Adbusters Web site  or the Media Awareness Network web site . Both are packed with valuable information on swimming against the tide of consumerism. Another web site that is definitely worth a look is PBS Kids’ Don’t Buy It: Get Media Smart. This site teaches kids about the rather questionable methods advertisers use to market products to kids and adults and teaches them to think critically when they’re analyzing advertising messages.

- Let your kids know how much you appreciate it when they express their gratitude for something you’ve done for them, like helping them with their homework or taking them to the movies. After all, they’ll be more likely repeat the behaviour if it elicits a positive response from you.

- Remember that Rome wasn’t built in a day. As you’ve no doubt noticed by now, children don’t come pre-wired with a sense of gratitude: they have to acquire it along the way. So try not to be become too discouraged if your seven-year old rarely remembers to say thank you for anything or if your 14-year old seems to feel that the world owes him anything his little heart desires. It takes time to teach kids values, but, with any luck, your efforts will be rewarded down the road.

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