Travel with Teens |
Parents of teens often wonder if the time for family vacationing has past. Is it worth the hassle?
It's officially summer: A time when our thoughts turn to rest, relaxation, and of course, summer vacations.
Family vacations can provide great opportunities to spend quality time together, expand our horizons and give each family member a chance to develop new and existing interests.
Family Fun Redefined
Not too long ago, you could plan to spend your vacation time in a beach house by the ocean, at Disney World, on a road trip to visit relatives across country, in a big city, or at a dude ranch out west. It didn't't really matter when, what or where. What did matter was spending time together in novel places, doing things you don't do everyday.
You may have found out by now that traveling with teenagers is quite a different story.
First, just finding a time when teens can tear themselves away from friends, summer jobs and a full array of interests and extracurricular activities, is often difficult.
Next, teens are much more opinionated about how they are willing to spend their time. A week in a tent on the shore of a Great Lake with plenty of swimming, hiking, boating and fishing used to be everyone's idea of a good time.
Now the concept of being away from MTV, friends and a daily shower, for even a few days, is totally unacceptable.
Keys to Successful Vacation Planning
Parents of teens often wonder if the time for family vacationing has past. Is it worth the hassle? Will you be wasting your limited leisure time and money on a stressful and unsatisfying experience you‚ll all look back on with disdain?
Sure it's worth it! It won't be a waste of time and resources!
Many of us who have been parenting teens for a while have already had the sudden and painful realization that our days together are numbered. How many more opportunities will you have left to vacation as a family? So, seize the day and go for it while you can!
With ample advanced and inclusive planning, research and compromise, you can create a personally enriching and mutually bonding vacation experience.
In planning a family vacation with teens, it is helpful to keep in mind some of the following considerations:
- Timing is of the essence
- Share the planning and responsibility
- The only rule is compromise
- Divide and conquer
- Don't expect too much
About Timing
In vacationing, as in so many of life's adventures, timing is of the essence.
It is never wise to plan your two-week vacation right in the middle of summer youth baseball league or toward the beginning of a summer job. Have a family meeting to select the optimum vacation time prior to when other summer activity schedules are established.
If parents' schedules are inflexible, teens should know this before their other priorities are set.
Inclusive Planning
Parents usually control the vacation budget, set limits and may therefore choose the vacation destination, but all family members should have equal responsibility for selecting activities.
One family member may love poking around in museums, another water sports and still another theme parks. One teen may want to check out colleges along the way, while another wants to enjoy the natural beauty of a national park.
The tourist industry provides so many exceptional Web resources that it is easy for any teen or parent to get involved researching vacation attractions by conducting a query based on topical and geographical key words (i.e. national parks, Texas).
The One Rule
It is often hard for parents to share our roles as vacation planners and tour guides. After all we earn the money and we want to show our kids the places and things that we value. However, if the goal of vacationing is to have fun, enjoy one another and develop our interests it is important that teens have their diverging interests equally considered. Compromise, mutual respect and cooperation are absolutely essential!
Each family member should be given the opportunity to select vacation activity choices and alternatives to research. It is important to get directions to each, find out how much time is required and what cost may be involved. Then the family can collectively decide on the feasibility of each: Can we afford it? Will we have time? Is it too far out of our way?
Divide and Conquer
One nice thing about traveling with teens is that you don't have to be with them every minute and for every activity. You can drop them off at the water park while you take in the botanical gardens with your spouse.
Or the mom and sister can go hiking in the state park while the dad and brother shop at the nearby outlet mall.
Of course there will be many things you will all want to do all together, but dividing into family subsets allows you to maximize everyone's enjoyment and provides the time needed for everyone's vacation priorities to be met.
It is also important to remain flexible and open to unexpected pleasures which inevitably occur while traveling.
Don't Expect Too Much
Even with the best-laid plans and most inclusive planning, there will be times when at least one person is unhappy or disappointed. Teens continue to ask, "Are we there yet?" Parents get tired and cranky. Everyone gets hungry or has to go the bathroom sometime when it's not convenient for the others. Siblings squabble over car seating, to whose music will the family listen, and most of the other things they'd be arguing about at home.
I remember one long road trip our family took through Eastern Canada, during the height of our kids‚ puberty years. At the time it seemed the back seat bickering would never cease. My husband and I were so frustrated that at one point, he even made good on that age-old parental threat and "stopped the car."
I remember him whispering to me as he pulled off the road, "What do I do now?"
I replied, "Judging by the silence in the back seat I guess that's it. You just stop the car."
Today you can ask any one of us which of our family vacations has been their favorite, and that road trip will get the unanimous vote, every time. Remember that often our most horrendous misadventures become the source of some of our richest, most joyful family memories.
Article contributed courtesy of Bridges.com.
