Would You Let Your Child Walk Home From School Alone? |
There's no easy answer, but here are some guidelines to help with your decision
In July, a Toronto mother blogged about how her son was brought home by police one afternoon. He had been walking back from his summer day camp, and the police—to the mother’s incredulity—felt this was too dangerous a situation because he was downtown (which is also where his family lived). He was 12.
As school approaches, a new cohort of parents are grappling with whether this is the year to let their children walk alone. So how do you know if it’s time?
This September, 10-year-old Devon will be walking to and from school on his own. Dianne, his mom, is confident he’s ready: the school is just two short blocks from home, there are no major roads to cross, and there are stay-at-home moms along the street, as well as his retired aunt. “Still, it’s nerve-wracking,” she admits.
Making your decision
The reality is there’s no magic age when a child is ready to walk alone (though must of us seem to settle on 10-12 years old). Each child is different, which means it’s up to parents to decide. But when your child starts asking to walk alone, that means you’ll need to ask yourself some questions about their competence. Questions such as:
- Are they good in unexpected situations or do they panic?
- Do they have a good sense of direction?
- Are they confident or easily frightened?
- Are they aware of their surroundings?
- Do they look both ways before crossing the street?
- Do they know where to go and who to call for help?
The route can play a big role in your decision.
- How busy are the roads?
- Is there a major street they will have to cross?
- Are there other kids walking home, other parents/caregivers?
- Do you know some of the people who live along the route?
Preparation
Six-year-old Veronica is already asking to walk the three blocks to her school bus stop alone—not going to happen, yet. Still, building your child’s competence, even at a young age, is important:
- On neighbourhood walks, let your child take the lead, point out names on street signs and make note of landmarks.
- Don’t tell them to fear strangers. Instead, teach your child to never go off with strangers.
- Teach them their address and phone number, and the addresses and phone numbers of places they can go for help.
- Don’t rely on cellphones. Yes, they’re great, but they can break, get lost or run out of batteries.
Keeping your fears in check
Today, less than 30% of Canadian kids walk or bike to school; fear is the number one reason why. Though crime—including crimes against children—has been declining since the ’90s, we perceive otherwise. A 2009 Mayo Clinic study sheds light on the situation: crime shows (they studied CSI and CSI Miami) portray the majority of violent criminals as strangers, when in reality they tend to be someone the victim knows. This, the researchers felt, fuels irrational fear of strangers among viewers.
The lesson? Turn off Dexter while making decisions about child-rearing.
When did you know your child was old enough to walk home from school alone? Let us know in the comments!
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Sarah | August 17, 2011 at 12:46 pm - §
My youngest walked home on her own last year. She was in kindergarten. We live next to the school and really it's just walking up the sidewalk, around the neighbor's house. Her teacher was quite concerned.
Shelisy | August 23, 2011 at 10:12 am - §
I think that a parent has to consider the fact when their child is getting ready to walk home is my child of legal age that should they arrive home if I am not there can they handle being home alone, can they get in the door by themselves, is the child capable of being left alone without social services being called due to the child being alone, if I were to go out would I call a babysitter to look after my child? Its the simple fact that if you can't legally leave them alone, then its not a question of if they are even ready, because if anything happens to you, and you should not be home when they arrive then you run the risk of having someone report you for being an unfit parent. And yes while while this article states crimes against kids has gone down, you are a parent responsible for the well being of that child, it takes but a blink of the eye for your child to disappear, can you afford to be one of those few people who do become unfortunate enough to have to go through the hells of a missing child?
mike | August 25, 2011 at 3:30 am - §
"crimes against children—has been declining since the ’90s", less than 30% of Canadian kids walk or bike to school". Less
E | September 5, 2011 at 10:26 am - §
We have lived in the same, quiet neighbourhood for 3 years now. My oldest is in grade 2 and will be biking home with his sister this year (she's starting JK) Both of them are very familiar with the route to school and we know the crossing guards well. There is always someone at home with the baby. I don't see a problem with how we are handling this, but every situation is different. If we lived in a busier part of town, we would probably hold off another year or two at least.
ninienne | September 7, 2011 at 7:32 pm - §
We would like to let our two children (10 and 7 serious girls) walk home from their school which is just three blocks from home without any big road to cross, but the school refuses to let them leave the school by themselves. What can we do ?There is no legal rules about it, why don't they let us take our responsibilities ?
Trish | September 16, 2011 at 11:41 am - §
I think we need to be more realistic about what the chances are that something will happen to them. We definitely should encourage our kids to be responsible and alert and the schools should run them through safety rules at the beginning of every year. When I see all the cars in traffic driving to and from school it makes me sick to my stomach. We should start this generation off to be more environmental friendly using schools in our neighbourhood or making them use school buses. It used to work for us when we were kids!
Veronica | October 25, 2011 at 2:03 pm - §
I am surprised to see so many people letting their young children walk home alone. I see kids in SK walking alone, and kids in Grade 7-8 walking home alone. I allow my 13 year old to walk to and from school, but not my 8 year old, and it will be years before I trust the Streets of my small town with my 5 year old. They are my responsibility, not the neighbours, not the drivers, MINE, I get them to and from school safely, as I should as a parent. Guaranteed when one of those children goes missing or is hit by a car, the parents will be blaming the rest of us, drivers, and careful parents for not watching out for their kids.
Cindy | April 11, 2012 at 12:20 pm - §
Although our school is a short trip down the alley I never let my son walk it alone. Even in 7/8 grade I waited at one end. Too many strange people and you never know. Now he is 15 and takes streetcar from corner of our street and straight to school. He is bigger, grew a lot. Was always small for his age. I don't worry now. My 8 year old daughter, no way. Our area has too many weirdos even on the street, it would only take one time of her not being "in the pack" with the other kids and she could be gone. One late morning/afterschool. I have had to tell total strangers when she's with me to leave her alone. Drives me crazy strange adults address the child and not me. Just what I need some smelly guy telling her how pretty she is or other comments. Not after Terri Stafford or years ago it was "Holly" in toronto. However, I know children who are "adult size" at 12 and they do fine, but if it were me I would still be careful!
Alice Perez | May 7, 2012 at 7:16 am - §
There are many parents who are truly hands on when it comes to taking care of their children. I admire them for doing so, though, on my part, as long as there's someone responsible for fetching them would be enough. Well, anyway, if you are interested in getting <a href="http://www.dallascitycpr.com/">CPR training Dallas</a>, you can always visit the website for inquiry. :)